Countless numbers of times, parents have come to me explaining that their children have “social skills problems”. Indeed they do! However, well-meaning parents often simplify the actual problem. This is because social skills have to be learned experientially. They cannot be learned off a blackboard, or in a book. Etiquette can be learned this way, but it is different for social skills. Often what confuses a parent is the fact that anxiety inhibits the process of learning social skills. This is because anxiety creates avoidance. The more avoidance, the less an individual has the opportunity to learn skills.

Social anxiety is the ultimate social skills deficit. The more it is controlled, the more learning can take place.

Social skills deficits affect individuals of all ages. For example, many adults explain their challenge as they don’t know what to say in social situations. They don’t know what to say after they say “hello”.

Social skills challenges include communication-conversation issues, body language, social-ability, interactive sensitivity, and more.

About Jonathan

Jonathan has pioneered psychotherapy for social anxiety, public speaking anxiety, and performance anxiety since 1978. He has worked with thousands of individuals of all ages in individual, family, and group therapy. He is the author of “Beyond Shyness: How to Conquer Social Anxieties” (Simon & Schuster) and “Work Makes Me Nervous: Overcome Anxiety and Build the Confidence to Succeed” (John Wiley &Sons, Inc.) Jonathan is an expert in media performance having been featured extensively on television, radio, and in print. This experience includes Oprah, NBC, CBS, ABC, CNN, FOX, The New York Times, Newsday, The Chicago Tribune, and The Boston Globe. Listen to him on WFAN SPORTS RADIO. Jonathan has extensively researched and developed clinical programs for the avoidant and dependent personality. He is a “diplomate” in clinical social work and is certified in New York State. In addition, he is certified by The Association of Applied Psychophysiology and Biofeedback. To view Jonathan Berent‘s pioneering work with Social Phobia, view the 1988 Sally Jessy Raphael Show by clicking here. To view jonathan talking about Workplace Anxiety on Long Island News Jobline, click here.